Protecting Your Child’s Beauty in the Cyber Age

Image courtesy of Clare Bloomfield

By Michelle Phillips

You’ve waited your whole life for the joys of parenthood.  Your amazing genes have made beautiful offspring, your warm heart and spirit have provided a wonderful example that has helped develop a child with deep inner beauty too… now what?  With all of the influences of the media and peer pressure, how do you keep their fragile self-esteem intact through the wonder years? And how much harder has that task become with our kid’s new online lives that have them plugged in to the “matrix” at younger ages every day?

It used to be that the biggest sore spot in a kid’s life was a schoolyard or neighborhood bully that could be diffused by an angry stomp over to the offender’s house and a gold old fashioned mom-to-mom talk.  Now thanks to the “world wide web” kids are opened up to a world of possible influences.  Not to mention the anonymity and distance of the internet gives people a false courage to say and do things they wouldn’t necessarily do in person.

While you can’t protect them from everything they see and hear there are some guidelines you can follow to help ease possible pains;

-       Computer use should be age appropriate. Younger kids have no clue about the bad possibilities of the web and tend to be overly free with pictures and personal information that could get them hurt.  Discussing this with them is a must but to really ensure proper behavior younger users should be kept in common areas for their online time.

-       No secrets. As your kids get older they may start to think they have “private lives” that you need to stay out of, but the way they post every aspect of their lives on the net their lives are hardly private. At every age make sure you have their passwords and access to ALL of their social sites.  Which brings me to my next point…

-       Keep up with the world of social media. I know you may think you have a lot better things to do than keep with what came after Myspace and Facebook in the world of cool social media sites yet when it comes to your kids, you don’t.  To truly know your kids you need to know the trends.

-       Constant communication is the key. The teen years can be filled with a lot of grunts and rolled eyes when it comes to parent-kid talks but continue to the dialogue.  Use teachable moments from the news to spark conversations and keep as open a line of communication as possible.  “I saw where some kids were expelled from a school for bullying online, is that going on at your school?” They may not tell you everything all the time but gathering what you can and maintaining their trust will pay off.

-       Use the resources available. There are a number of sites that you can use for both you and your kids to monitor what is said and seen about you on the web.  Pay sites like ReputationDefender and sites like Safesocial and GoGoStat can help keep you up to date with your personal information.

Most important is to continue to be a good example to your kids.  As much as their peer group will play a role in their development you are still the biggest model for who they are.  To be sure you are building and protecting their self-esteem, speak well of yourself and others.  Loving yourself is yet another way you show them love and build a shield around them.

For more great ways to make your dreams come true, check out Michelle’s bestselling book, “The Beauty Blueprint- 8 Steps to Building the Life and Look of your Dreams” (Hay House, 2011) is wherever books are sold. You can listen to her Mondays at 12pm est on www.HayHouseRadio.com .  She is also a regular guest on the national TV shows, “The Daily Buzz”, and “Daytime”. www.michellephillips.com

Tags: cyber attack, cyber bullying, keep kids safe online, parenting

Category: Mind, Body & Spirit